Archives for category: Quirky

I haven’t wrote in a while and it’s because I’ve been fairly busy trying to sort myself out. My confidence was slipping really badly due to not working and not seeing friends so I’m now volunteering with a great little charity shop not too far from me. Everyone is really nice and I can do as much as I want without letting anyone down.

I would say things were going pretty well until recently when I started getting upset more everyday over little things. I’m definitely due a trip to the doctors to talk about how things are going. Thankfully I have a new doctor who knows about mental health and actually knows what he’s talking about. I was also away staying with my boyfriend for a week which was really over due since I hadn’t seen him in four weeks. Unfortunately, it’s my birthday next week and he won’t be able to come and see me since he’s working full time and couldn’t get the day off, I’m not going to lie… I’m heartbroken. He wasn’t there on the day last year but came up the day after, and I wouldn’t have minded if he couldn’t have at all because we had only been dating a few weeks but this year what with everything that’s been happening, it was the one thing I truly wanted. But no matter how much I pout and cry there’s nothing that can be done. He’ll still put in tons of effort as he always does.

If anyone follows my blog or even reads the ‘not so greatly put together’ posts, you might notice that I was having some family problems. They have been somewhat sorted but it’ll never be the same again. The words that were said by the people involved have greatly affected my health. Nothing bad was said about me personally but when it’s aimed at your immediate family it does affect you greatly, as I’m sure everyone will understand. Because of this I have been crying… a lot. I know it’s a normal reaction of mine but I was annoyed with myself because I was feeling good and motivated and it seems like these particular people keep knocking me back down again. Because of this I have decided to not see them for a little while. They need to make an effort with my brother and my mum and until I see that improvement I don’t want to be associated with them. Some may call that harsh and hurtful but they ignored my brother for 3 months without even mentioning his name so I’m sure I can manage just fine.

As for my best friend, I’ve not seen her for nearly 2 months… again. She told me the last time we met up that we’d definitely meet up before I went away to see my boyfriend for a week. I gave her the date I was leaving and I said I was free pretty much everyday, since I’m not working at the moment. She didn’t mention it again. I asked her if she was free and she said she wasn’t. So I was fine with it, she’s got family stuff going on like everyone else but when I see she’s tagged her and her boyfriend in at the cinema or they’re at lunch somewhere it just makes me so mad. Ever since they’ve became official all her time goes into being with him and of course, yeah that does happen but rule number 1 is that you should never forget about your friends; and she has. My boyfriend told me to just ask her if she wants to go for lunch but I point blank refuse to do that since I’ve been the one to ask for about 6 months now and I’m exhausted. Also, the last time we hung out, her boyfriend was away on holiday for a week, so I felt like she was just sat with me because he wasn’t there. And she even said “We should make this lunch count cause who knows when we’ll meet up again!” If I didn’t know any better I would say that she was blowing me off before I even got a chance to make plans with her again.

Anyway, if anyone has read this, I’m fine if no one has, it was purely to let go of some of the negative feelings I’ve been having. Writing about them is so therapeutic; it’s unreal! I hope everyone is well!

Much love and have fun 🙂 x

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Is it sad to name the things I own? I always like giving names to objects or cuddly toys cause it makes them more real in my opinion. When I stay with my boyfriend I always meet this friendly cat that lives down the road. I don’t know her name so I just call her Jessie cat cause that’s what she looks like. She has a number on her collar and I often think about texting her owner and asking what her name is but I think that’s a little too crazy…

Anyway, to the point of this entry. Toshi is my new and beloved laptop. He’s a Toshiba one and my boyfriend, knowing me so well, asked me what I was going to name him but I couldn’t think of anything so he suggested Toshi and here we are!

I bought him at a car boot sale of all places (The laptop not my boyfriend). For anyone who may not know what a car boot sale is, it’s basically where people sell things from their cars. I know it may sound a tad dodgy. My mum personally thought I was mad when I told her I bought Toshi from there. “What if it’s stolen?” She asked. And yeah, that did cross my mind but that’s the risk you have to take with these things. My main worry was that I bought him and he wasn’t going to work very well and I’d have to fix him up a bit but he works a treat. The only thing I need for him now is STICKERS! Every laptop needs an array of quirky fun stickers. Maybe that’s just me but hey!

It’s great having him now because I can watch Game of Thrones (I’m only on season 4, I was very late to this particular party) and obviously write about what a weird person I am because I’m talking about my computer as if he’s an actual person. Also, having the freedom to write about things on actual keyboard is the greatest feeling ever! I don’t even know if anyone reads what I write but I hope you enjoy it as much as I enjoy writing about it.

I think me and Toshi are off for a sleep now (I seriously need to stop) but we’ll be back with more silly words. My head is absolutely buzzing with ideas of what to write about but I’m trying to keep to one post a day… if my fingers will let me.

Much love and have fun 🙂 x